May Day Cafe, 8 July 2018

There was a lot of eating these past few days. GF and I hit Little Mekong Night Market where we had egg rolls and she got barbecue and I helped her eat it because nothing really jumped out at me. Kafe Nasty texted me about accidentally picking up three dollar ramen from the Asian bodega because he doesn’t read price tags any more, big money balling. All the food trucks had super long lines for food I wasn’t enthusiastic about and then I waited in line with GF at the barbecue tent and I thought, “Maybe ribs…” but I don’t want the mess that comes with ribs so I thought, “Maybe the rib tips…” but I wasn’t enthusiastic about that and then they had something called “Meat & Mac” which both GF and I thought was a ticket straight to the biffy. I told GF I wasn’t really enthusiastic about the menu and she told me to scurry off and find something I wanted to eat. Alas, I came back empty handed.
There was a sushi food truck to which I said, “No.”
About the only thing I was interested in was the silk screening booth where I could have picked up a freshly made Bruce Lee t-shirt but I didn’t get one, I was distracted by the break-dancing contest.
Anyway, GF got the smoked mac & cheese (which tasted like mac & cheese) and corn on the cob (which was super succulent).
On the way back to GF’s we stopped at Champ’s where I bought her some onion rings and got a chicken strip meal and she says, “You got chicken strips?” Apparently, she did not expect me to be into chicken strips.
Anyway, a bad Russ Meyer flick, Dead & Buried, a good Russ Meyer flick, and a tossy-turny night’s sleep later, GF is headed out the door to pick up breakfast and brings me back an OJ and a turkey & cheese on a ciabatta with semi-crisp butter lettuce and I think they were either marinated tropea onions or purple pickled white or yellow onion. Whatever they were, they were a translucent lavender color and provided a familiar tang that reminded me a bit of an Italian sub.
It’s an interesting test of my palette because I didn’t buy it, I could recognize most of the ingredients, and then the website is mostly under construction. For real, they have a Woman Smiling Alone With Coffee above the caption “Owner (not pictured above)” on their about page and the menu page is mostly blank aside from a list of drinks, underneath each is the phrase “Describe your drink”, so I have no way of knowing exactly what it is GF fed me, I’m pretty sure she was trying to kill me because I think everybody is trying to kill me, particularly my doctor, who is trying to kill me with blandness and boredom until I inevitably throw myself off a goddamned bridge.
So, without aide of knowing exactly what I shoved in my fried bologna hole, I will now attempt to describe this sandwich and also totally blow all my credibility.
The turkey: I’m going to guess it was smoked and seasoned with an awful lot of paprika as there were red-orange rivulets running down from the surface into the flesh. Here and there were flicks of cracked black peppercorns.
The cheese?

It didn’t have the high pitch of Swiss that usually cuts through but it had a similar color and texture. However, no air holes were present which leads me to believe this was provolone unless people are doing things with hole-less Swiss these days.
The lettuce was bright green throughout but it was lettuce. We’ve been over lettuce. I don’t believe we need to go back over that here.
Those little onion things? God, I wish I knew what those were. What kind they were and how they were prepared because, again, they added hues of an Italian sub.
But the real werewolf in this girls’ dormitory was the ciabatta, which was buttery on the outside and fluffy on the inside, seasoned with herbs. Nothing too strong or signature like rosemary but perhaps a few dashes of oregano or thyme, a little garlic, a little extra virgin olive oil.
Overall? Whatever the fuck this was, I liked it, and if I ever do see their menu, I’ll be sure to note how many ways I was wrong, which I’m probably pretty fucking wrong. I’d say give them your money.
And then yesterday I had a union luncheon. They fed us Pizza Hut. I had two pieces of veggie alfredo. Veggie because it’s good for you, alfredo because I am a gross person who no longer has the desire to live.