A Collection Of The Ones That Should Have Made It To Sandwich Bully (But Got Only As Far As Instagram)
Northbound, 30 May 2016
Original Caption: Reuben from Northbound. Big CHUNKS of fall-apart smoked corned beef; subdued, savory sauerkraut; subtle tang from thousand island sneaks in here and there. Would order again.Remarks: “Savory” sauerkraut? Was I on fucking thorazine? Since when is sauerkraut savory? Now I have to go back and check this out because I have trouble believing myself.
Finer Meat Co, 18 July 2016
Original Caption: Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh mu god oh my dig ohfvjfcjvvmy god deep breath…DREAMS!
A REAL cheesesteak, courtesy of Finer Meat Co’s food truck. The brick and mortar location is at 3747 Nicollet. Give these people your money.
Remarks: I was going through a phase where I would caption pictures of food with “DREAMS!” I literally don’t know why and it was only two years ago. But I was legitimately excited to find a legitimate cheesesteak.
Pho Hoa, 2 December 2016
Original Caption: THIS is what a $4 bành mí looks like. Pho Hoa is putting every other bành mí shop on Nicollet on notice.Remarks: No, it isn’t. No, they aren’t.
My Burger, 13 January 2017
Original Caption: Only reason I went to MyBurger today was because I had a BOGO coupon.Top: Pepper jack, fried onions, dill pickles, fried egg, and mayo.
Bottom: Swiss, raw onions, sweet pickles, tomato, and BBQ sauce.
I figured there’d be an upcharge for the fried egg but for the BBQ sauce?
Really.
Remarks: I stand by everything in that Instagram caption.
Slice of New York, 17 April 2017
Original Caption: Grabbed Slice of New York’s Italian Beef and I’m saying Sorrento Cucina WHO?…
Get it? Because it - See, it’s called Sorrento Cucina Due and - It’s a pun. I’m saying they aren’t very good compared to Slice. Though Slice’s au jeus looks like cloudy piss.
Six Comments Down-Thread: Yeah, it gave me food poisoning. I was shitting water the rest of the night so I would advise against it.
Marino’s Deli, 3 June 2017
Original Caption: The Sub Marino, a hybrid Italian hero and meatball sandwich, worth US$52.99, costs not even seven.Remarks: Man, I’ll still go out of my way to go to Marino’s. Three Meshell Ndegeocello Stars.
Broder’s Cucina Italiana, 24 June 2017
Original Caption: This just proves that happy endings aren’t just for fairy tales, they’re real and true in real life also.…
Finally had what people have been telling me about when they ask, “But have you had REAL provolone?” and it came on Broders’ South Jersey Hoagie.
Remarks: I’ll find literally any reason to use my favorite quote from Gypsy Rose Blancharde. Google her.
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